Under different circumstances, I would be been jumping off the wall in excitement by now. But given that we’re having a hard time hearing each other, I just focused in creating a more lucid conversation. Meaning, I can’t laugh too much and I had to speak up.
My 30-minute conversation with Rissa made mostly of updates. Hows she’s been? How’s the slowly dropping weather affecting her? Am I done with my training? Who got redundiated? Who stayed? Why was I unable to join the UAL farewell party? Yadda-yadda.
I also asked her how she’s coping in her new country and what she’s been busy with (apart from work of course). She told me that she’s getting by just fine but still misses home. I nonchalantly told her to go out more – and bundle up – so she can take her mind off things that may cause her to want to go back. She explained that she’s been working on seeing more of the place and reminding herself to adjust in time for her family’s move there. I wanted to tell her that I wanted to get out of the country too but was unable to go around it. It must have gotten lost in the very many things to share in the very little time we had. After my long talk with Mona the day before, it made me realize that I wanted to see the world. It’s just a voice at the back of my head but after talking to friends abroad two days in a row, you’d eventually start to itch.
The hankering mostly comprise of getting out of the world I created – a comfortable, secure and repetetive blanket. I don’t mind doing what Rissa is doing, but what will eventually bother me is the need to go back here … eventually. I won’t last long far from home. And it seems that my two friends have resolved to stay away permanently.
I found that it was difficult to air what I felt when I was yelling… I wasn’t comfortable in the fact that my neighbours can hear me talking about wanting to see Red Deer or Orange County. But this I can say, if the change I am hoping for doesn’t happen in April. I’ll give myself two years to gather all my resources, then I’ll buy my plane ticket to see the world.
Until then, I’ll make the best of what I have right here.
Currently listening to Nashville Skyline by Dishwalla via Launchcast