5:34am

19 04 2009
I paused for a moment and looked at the sky. Another day, another life to live, another chance to try to be happy.

I sat in my terrace for a good ten minutes listening to the surroundings as it slowly woke. A silent moment, a time to reflect, I ask myself, “when was the last time you laughed? … A good hearty laugh?” I wondered ever so deeply, where did that question come from? Such a tall issue to answer, I wonder as to when can I answer this. My time has ticked a steady pace towards the unknown and still to this day the indefinite is the only thing known to me. It is a perilous situation; ever traveled without a map or without knowing where you’re going? That is the danger I am facing. Until I find my true north or a compass to guide me, I’ll be stuck in this twilight zone.

I stood up to look into the east. Spectacular lights start to dance as the morning grows. A cool breeze breaks my senses and stings my eyes a little. I took it in, eventually this wind will dissipate to hot air as the sun ascend. The horizon is becoming more and more beautiful. Light does make sense of things but when you put the darkness in the mix, the spectrum of drama unfolds. Colors are borne from the chemistry of light and dark. A question again … oh when will I ever stop asking these pointless rhetorical questions? “Where are you going?”

It seems I have so much more to take, to give, to lose, to learn and unlearn … but when will it stop? And should I even be asking?

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