A Melancholic

15 03 2009

By the time you read this, I’ll be up the mountains.

I had to let go one of my subordinates last Monday. And I’d be lying if I told you that I was not affected.

It’s so bad when someone works their darndest best but still fails to meet the expected performance. I saw him day in day out, stretching himself to the limit and gunning for success. It was rather pitiful to some extent to watch. At times I would trust him with little things at work just to boost his self confidence. The industry I am at is unbelievably taxing and I have to be the bringer of bad news. He is two decades older than me and he has a family to support and there I was … a kid in the corporate world telling him that as much as I’d like to keep him, I can’t.

It was awful. But none of that really matters much, I don’t have the courage to fight the system. Until I’m strong enough to turn my back, i’lll just roll with the punches.

Before the day ended, I asked my boss if I can get a vacation. It took some time before he gave me a yes. And to be honest, I would have gone anyway in case he disagreed. I grabbed some clothes with me and went up the mountains to watch the flowers bloom. I’m not sure if I’ll enjoy it but I’ll try.

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